[ He doesn't have the energy to protest and more to the point doesn't want to, so into Hua Cheng's lap he goes. Xie Lian tries to absorb all the kind words and feels himself shudder as he does so, getting over his self-loathing a little from the onslaught of support he's given. Sniffing, he nods. ]

I wanted to get rid of ... [ The mess. He does look up then, earnestly trying to protect He Xuan who may not deserve it but also never intended to reveal such an awful lot about himself. ] San Lang, don't be angry with him. Imagine if I died and you thought you had me back for a night, only for it to be a lie. Even his bones must feel sick at the sight of me and that's probably why he left, he must be humiliated.